Insomnia

Now that I am writing, I am finally getting sleepy…no wait…still here. Ah, shoot, I was almost drowsy for a second. I woke up at about 3am thinking about stuff, namely food, and I could not go back to sleep. What do you do to get tired again when your body, for some crazy reason, thinks it should be up at the clubbin’ hours of the night? Warm milk? No, tried that and it turned out to be a big mistake – you shouldn’t drink milk when it is still simmering. Now my tongue is swollen.
I went to the grocery store today and got some sweet food products. I got this new herbal tea called ‘lemon liftoff’, and it is looking mighty fine sitting on the counter next to a can of dog food. The little picture on the box is of a lemon-shaped rocket taking off. Maybe this – warm tea – will put me to sleep. Three cups later the tea is still having no effect. In fact, I am feeling pretty lucid right now – the light is on upstairs, and I am ready to pull an all-nighter!
By now, the first two cups of tea have passed through my body, and I have to visit the restroom. In the mirror, I check out my eyes – weird, the pupils are dilated, and I feel like there is a short, but talented, rapper beat-boxing to my heartbeat in my head. Needless to say, I am inspired to beat-box myself and start making the typical night club sounds with my mouth that irritate my wife. She takes notice, from the other room, and wakes up just enough to have an articulated conversation with me.
“You’re hitting trees,” she exclaims. I see the potential for fun here.
“Where am I hitting trees?”
“On the road.”
“What am I driving?”
“The car.”
“Why didn’t we take the spaceship out this time, honey, it has cruise control?!”
“Shutup.” Okay, maybe she doesn’t want to have a dream-induced conversation. But I am still not asleep. What could be boring enough to put me to sleep? Maybe reading a textbook. No, I am not that desperate. My writing, yes, that is boring enough to put me to sleep. So, I sit down and start writing ws blog entry. Snow that I amriting I am finallllylllll getting sleepy sffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff.fva d. And suddenly I am dreaming of a lemon-shaped rocket stocked with dog food. Wait, we don’t even have a dog!